I have defined some of the words (underlined) in the dialogue, which you can add to your Personal Dictionary. Click on the Excel icon to download the word list to your PC or mobile device, which you can thereafter import into your Personal Dictionary. They are also listed below.
Scroll down to the bottom for links to a crossword and word search using words from this post, as well a YouTube video. 

Butcher’s hook – A look

Apple and pears – Stairs

Whistle and flute – suit

Boat race – Face

Syrup of figs – Wig

Trouble and strife – Wife

Mince pies – Eyes

Dustbin lids – Kids

Skin and blister – Sister

Tom and Dick – Sick

Ruby Murray – Curry

Weasel and stoat – Coat

Taters in the mould – Cold

China plate – Mate

Duck and Dive – Hide

Tea leaf – Thief

Titfer – Hat (Titfer = tit for tat)

Plates of meat – Feet

North and south – Mouth

Ball and chalk – Walk

Rub-a-dub – Pub

Todd Sloane – Alone

Half-inch – Pinch

Giraffe – Laugh

Tea leaf – Thief

Gert and Daisy – Crazy

Rosy Lee – Tea

Hank Marvin – Starving

Have a butcher’s at this photo Ed. Do you know any of the people standing in front of the apple and pears?

Of course I do Judy. The man in the whistle was my grandfather and the woman next to him was my grandmother.

Yes? I thought I would have recognised their boats. I’ve seen them in other photos.

It’s probably because of the way they were dressed up. My grandfather was as bald as a coot, but he was wearing a syrup for this photo. I don’t know why.

They were probably going to a fancy dress party. Even though it’s a black and white photo, I can see that his trouble and strife – your grandmother – had beautiful mince pies.

Yes, they were deep blue. Do you recognise those dustbin lids sitting in front of them?

I guess they must be your father, Ed senior and his skin and blister, Mary. He looks a bit tom and dick.

He told me he’d eaten a big ruby murray before the photo was taken, so he was in a right two and eight.

Yes, he looks like he was. Your auntie looks older, but otherwise the same

I think she’s still got that weasel and stoat she’s wearing and this photo is nearly 50 years old

Happy days.

Not always. I remember it was taters in their house. His best china Stan was a tea leaf and often came round to duck and dive from the police. He used to wear a titfer to try and disguise himself

Did that work?

Not really. The coppers could recognise his plates of meat from 100 metres. He wore size 15 shoes. He had a very distinctive north and south too. Anyway, when the coast was clear, my Grandad and Stan would take a ball and chalk down to the rub-a-dub

Leaving your Grandmother on her todd, with the kids. What did Stan used to half-inch?

Teapots.

Teapots? You are having a giraffe aren’t you? He was a tea leaf, who stole teapots. I think I’ve heard it all now.

Yes, it’s all a bit gert and daisy when you think about it. Talking of teapots, we could do with a nice cup of rosy lee.

I suppose you want something to eat too.

Yes please Judy. This nostalgia has made me hank marvin.

To test your knowledge, why not do a crossword puzzle, using words from this text?

Click here for instructions on how to play.

To test your knowledge, why not do a word search puzzle, using words from this text?

Click here for instructions on how to play.

Cockney Rhyming Slang

Click on the image to watch a video about Cockney Rhyming Slang

Acker Bilk (n) – Milk

Do you want acker bilk in your tea?

Apple and pears – Stairs

Get up those apple and stairs. It is bedtime.

Apple pie (n) – Sky

Look at the apple pie Wendy. I’ve never seen it so blue.

April showers (n) – Flowers

Don’t forget to water the April showers in the garden.

Auntie Ella – Umbrella

It might rain later. I better take an auntie ella.

Aunt Joanna – Piano

My father liked to play on the joanna when he came home from work.

Ball and Chalk – Walk

Shall we go for a ball and chalk?

Bees and honey – Money

I haven’t got any bees and honey in my pockets.

Boat Race – Face

Look at ‘er boat. She looks as miserable as sin.

Brown Bread – Dead

Her grandfather has been brown bread for over 20 years.

Butcher’s hook – A look

Have a butcher’s at this photo.

China plate – Mate (friend)

Cheer up my old china, things could be worse.

Currant bun – Sun

It’s been so cloudy all day, that we haven’t seen the currant bun once.

Dicky dirt (n) – Shirt

Mum did you wash my favourite dickie dirt?

Dog and bone – Phone

My wife spends all evening on the dog, talking to her mother.

Duck and Dive – Hide

I had to duck and dive from my wife today. I broke her favourite mug and she’s very angry.

Duke of Kent – Rent

I had to borrow money from my sister, so that I could pay the duke of kent.

Duke of Spain – Rain

Look at those grey clouds. I’m sure we’ll see the duke of spain come down later.

Dustbin lids – Kids

Those dustbin lids are making too much noise upstairs.

Gert and Daisy – Crazy

Ted’s a bit gert and daisy. He takes his cat for a walk in the evening.

Giraffe – Laugh

You are having a giraffe, aren’t you? You are not going to the restaurant dressed like that.

Half-inch – Pinch (to steal)

I half-inched this apple from the market stall.

Hampstead Heath (n) – Teeth

He has had so many problems with his Hampstead’s. He’s been to the dentist three times this week

Hank Marvin – Starving

I haven’t eaten all day. I’m absolutely hank marvin.

I don’t adam-and-eve it (exp) – I don’t believe it

I don’t adam-and-eve it! Someone has stolen my bicycle.

Jam jar – Car

Get in the jam jar, we are driving to the beach.

Loaf of Bread – Head

What have you got in that loaf of yours? You never think about your brother.

Mince Pies – Eyes

Look at her mince pies. They are as blue as the sky.

Mork and Mindy – Windy

Forget about putting your hat on. It’s too mork and mindy.

Mutt and Jeff (adj) – Deaf

Can you speak up? I’m a bit mutt and jeff.

North and south – Mouth

I wish you would shut your north and south. You’ve been talking non-stop all evening.

Pete Tong – Wrong

Decorating this Christmas tree is not easy. It’s all gone a bit pete tong.

Plates of meatFeet

I’ll be happy to put my plates of meat up on the sofa. I’ve been standing all day.

Roger Moore – Door

Shut the roger moore, it is getting cold in here.

Rosy Lee – Tea

Any chance of a rosy lee? I am really thirsty.

Rub-a-Dub – Pub

Let’s go to the rub-a-dub and have a few pints.

Ruby Murray – Curry

That Indian restaurant serves the best ruby, anywhere in London.

Sherbert dab (n) – Taxi (cab)

Shall we get a sherbert to the airport? It’s easier than the bus.

Skin and Blister – Sister

I haven’t seen your skin and blister all day. Is she even here?

Skyrocket – Pocket

Put your money back in your skyrocket. I’m paying.

Syrup of figs – Wig

Look! The wind has blown his syrup of his head.

Taters in the mould – Cold (Taters = potatoes)

Get your winter coat, it’s really taters outside.

Tea leaf – Thief

Some tea leaf has stolen my newspaper. It was on the table.

Titfer – Hat (Titfer = tit for tat)

Oh no! I left my titfer on the bus.

Todd Sloane – Alone

I’ll be on my todd this evening. My wife and kids are going to the cinema.

Tom and Dick – Sick

I should not have gone down that slide. I’m feeling a bit tom and dick now.

Trouble and strife – Wife

I’ll see if I can borrow some money from my trouble and strife.

Two and eight – State (of being upset)

After the car accident she was in a right two and eight. She’s okay now.

Weasel and stoat – Coat

That’s a lovely weasel and stoat. Where did you buy it?

Whistle and flute – suit

I’ve got to get a new whistle for my sister’s wedding

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